gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
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I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
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I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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