goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
