So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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