So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
