well I can't set my house on fire every night
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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