some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
