help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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