i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
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