Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
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Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
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fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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