and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
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