dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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