He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
