How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
