White coat. Heels.
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Randomize
