I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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