oh god the rape fog is back!
I just threw up on my dentist
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize