im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
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