I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
At least make sure they are 18
Why
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
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Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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