hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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