She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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