Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
