I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
only you would photoshop your dick
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
