I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
