I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
