you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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