remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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