I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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