these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Please don't give away my fajitas
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