The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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