Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
