Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
