yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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