Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize