this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
