The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
