so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
