Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
