I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm both gender and math confused
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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