Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
