Your dad touched me again.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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