sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
