Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
