then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
