i just wanna soil my oats bro
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
