Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
