watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Randomize
