one word: firstdatebathroomanal
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
