Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
