I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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