Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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